One aspect of trying to navigate this trauma that's not really discussed in depth yet deserves more recognition is the general state of tiresome I find myself in on a constant basis. I've been depressed about this since the day I found out about it, which was years ago. I don't know if anyone else can relate to what I'm about to say, but parts of my brain feel dead. Like, I can literally feel my brain inactive in certain areas. It's such a weird but very real feeling. I know parts of your brain basically die when you suffer from chronic depression as I have, and I'm no biologist/scientist, but what if those dead sections can never come back to life?

That's something I really fear. That I've been depressed for years straight and that the literal biology and structure of my brain has entered a state of no return. Honestly that's how it feels on so many days. I'm in this constant trauma-induced brain fog state where I have this general "lost" feeling where I'm not sure what I'm doing or what's happening around me. That sounds like textbook dissociation, right? I've definitely dissociated hundreds of times before to escape the pain of this trauma.

I just wish society would stop doing this to children and that my voice could finally be heard. I just want a voice. But I can't even have that.

Im proud to admit that i have completely cut off good friends of mine after finding out that they, after me trying to convince them not to, mutilated their sons. More people need to do this. It hurts losing friends, but i personally cannot find it within myself to associate with anyone who condones or allows routine infant male genital mutilation. I dont care about "ignorance" or any of that shit. If you cut your son, i cut you out of my life. Its really that simple. This is the main reason why i dont associate with my family at all apart from literally one cousin that shares my similar view. Thats it. It sucks being alone but my morality literally prevents me from ignoring that those around me have had their boys mutilated. I just cant do it. I cant be around them, dont want to talk to them and want nothing to do with them.

I use alcohol to numb the intense feelings i have towards circumcision. It does make things feel so much better for a long while, but the feeling never lasts forever. Its always a fleeting happiness. I dont know if there is anything on earth that can make me whole again.

My drinking has become a serious problem in the last few years. I really dont know when to stop and ive tried quitting before to no avail.

Anyone else dealing with this trauma via drinking heavily? I know i cant be alone in that

Hey! 

Is there any forum here where works of literature on MGM could be shared?

Thanks.

Religious liberty is often used as an argument for infant circumcision. Let me present an opposite view.

I believe my body is a very good thing. I believe that my sexual desires, including my desire for wholeness, and my desire for all the sensations that accompany a foreskin retracting over the glans, are a very good thing. I believe my body, including my foreskin, was literally made in the image of God, who has a perfected physical body. I believe that I intentionally chose to come to earth to receive a body because I knew that it would bring me closer to God. I believe that sometime after I die, I will be resurrected in a perfected, physical body—with a foreskin—and that I will be closer to God because of my whole body. I believe little children are born pure, worthy, and whole. And for me, personally, when a medical provider attached a plastabell device around my foreskin and pulled it tight, she or he separated me from one of the most divine parts of my creation. I am spiritually impacted by that. I believe God values consent, deeply, and that he is sad when parents violate the consent of a child on something so personal and long-lasting.
 
I believe God is deeply fair, values individual accountability, and will not damn a child because of the decisions of a parent, including the decision to protect the sacredness of a child’s body and leave it whole. I believe everyone should be allowed to practice whatever religion they want, according to their own beliefs. A belief system should not have authority to make permanent changes to a child's anatomy because that child may grow up and desire to change their religion and may not wish their body to reflect their prior belief system—I believe it is a violation of religious freedom to allow parents to permanently modify the anatomy of a child.
 
I believe the research that suggests there is a decrease in masturbatory pleasure*. I also believe foreskin play, like docking, is valuable to a lot of gay men. I do not believe religious freedom should include allowing parents to make masturbation less pleasurable or certain forms of gay sex physically impossible.

For other believing folks out there, are there ways in which you feel like your religious freedom was violated by your infant circumcision?

*see the attached source document.

I'm coming up on a year, having started on June 17, 2025 at my husband's suggestion. He actually bought me my first devices, and I've put in somewhere between 4000 and 6000 hours. Mostly a set-and-forget thing each day, though, which quickly becomes a normal daily habit, like shaving or brushing teeth.

Although not everything can be regained, and progress can feel frustratingly slow - one year is barely getting started! - we've both definitely noticed some changes for the better, in terms of improved sensation, and better gliding motion. And, simply wearing a retainer or other silicone cover during the day immediately solved my discomfort from abrasion against underwear - quite a relief in itself! And although it'll take years more, one day I will no longer need that.

It's definitely helped my mental health to be on a path to improvement, to at least partly put right what happened to me all those years ago.

The social contract was shredded for me literally minutes after i was born. I truly dont give a fuck how this sounds but i dont even want to have to work because of this crime that has been committed against. Seriously. I have no drive or will to add any value or contribute anything to this shit society and world because of my trauma. I want the government to pay for me to be able to sit my ass on the couch for weeks on end if i so choose.

Fuck the united states and i hate that i have to get up every morning and go to work and produce even more value for the country that mutilated me. It actually pains me every day when i think about just how actually insanely unfair and unjust it all is. And i dont think what im saying is even extreme. Its actually a complete appropriate response to the damage that was done to me (the permanent mutilation of my penis)😡

So I have tried countless times to try that "gentle educating" bullshit when discussing mgm in public or privately. And everytime its the same fucking thing. They refuse to acknowledge the harm of mgm and double down on their shit viewpoints. After literal hundreds of failures in trying to convince people that mgm is fucking insane and needs to be ended immediately, now i simply refuse to do anything.

We all know how easy it is for us to "stumble" upon circumcision in the wild... whether that be an overheard conversation, television, radio, fucking whatever. Of course I still lose my fucking mind whenever it is mentioned around me but i no longer waste my energy trying to convince others of this anymore.

I mean why the fuck should I? For every other social justice issue, people don't go out in public gently trying to convince others to believe them. Other social justice issues are a lot more physical and in your face and intactivism needs the same fucking energy - we need more men that are extremely angry and willing to get hands on if necessary. Intactivism is filled with pussies and our progress truly proves it

The worst part about this for me is whenever someone jokes about this it hurts. It hurts a lot, and it’s everywhere. I can’t go anywhere without hearing a joke about it can’t watch TV can’t play a game. I can’t listen to music. I can’t do anything without their being some sort of joke about this and it always just hurts

"Circlist has always permitted, and will continue to permit, circumcision related fetish/sexual postings/materials, straight, gay or otherwise."
– Ben Winkie. (2005, June) (International Circumsexual Symposium, Washington, D.C.)

"Interests: Being masturbated whilst circumcision is being discussed. Watching circumcisions with others. Etc."
– Ben Winkie (Weblog)

Ben Winkie has also released materials of him pleasuring himself over infant circumcision restraint devices.


Daniel T. Halperin Ph.D., who promotes and is proud of being a member of Circlist - an online group that exists for writing and distributing fetish material (erotica [usually involving minors or infants], images) of circumcision and child pornography. A moderator of Circlist, Vernon Quaintance, was convicted for child pornography and molesting an 11 year old boy - served 40 days in jail. Vernon Quaintance also founded and lead the Gilgal Society - and published a full book of circumcision erotica, as well as distributed video tapes.

Edgar J. Schoen M.D., who was on the AAP committee about circumcision in 1989 and 1999 was also involved with Circlist and the Gilgal Society (being in a position of being able to approve or disapprove content) prior to his death in 2016. Penn (from Penn & Teller) reported that Schoen said circumcised penises smell and look better. And here is a line from some of his circumcision poetry "It's a great work of art like the statue of Venus if you're wearing a hat on the head of your penis." - Schoen

Thomas E. Wiswell, M.D., published a long series of now discredit studies claiming circumcision prevented urinary tract infections. He coauthors articles with Brian Morris and is associated with the Gilgal Society. Edgar J. Schoen used these discredited and methodologically flawed studies for 1989 AAP Circumcision Policy Statement.
"I have some good friends who are obstetricians outside the military, and they look at a foreskin and almost see a $125 price tag on it. Each one is that much money. Heck, if you do 10 a week, that's over $1,000 a week, and they don't take that much time.
– Wiswell (1987-6-22) (The age-old question of circumcision. Boston Globe, p. 43)

Brian Morris, DSc. one of the biggest promotors of circumcision, and who co-authored many scientific articles on the subject was deeply involved in Circlist and the Gilgal Society. He On his website he also recommended websites with the following titles; Erotic Male Circumcision, Circumcised Kids, Circumcision Fetish, SCARandACORN, Teen Circ, Cutting Club, and Beschnittene Gay Boys. He was secretary of Circumcision Academy of Australia - another group dedicated to circumcision erotica and promoting circumcision culturally in Australia.
He has attempted to have critics fired from their positions and has attempted to block research publication that is contrary to his own published work, including the studies of Morten Frisch M.D., Ph.D. (a professor of sexual health epidemiology.) Morris used his mailing list to enact a campaign to write critical letters to the editors of the International Journal of Epidemiology. Brian Morris, along with Jake Waskett and Ronald Gray made extensive, obstructive peer-review comments in a review which included serious insinuations of racism and amateurism. "Breaking unwritten confidentiality and courtesy rules of the peer-review process, Morris distributed his slandering criticism of our study to people working for the same cause." - Morten Frisch
"Circumcision should be made compulsitory." - Brian J. Morris

Jake H. Waskett (no degree), a member of both Circlist and the Gilgal Society, was the #1 editor of circumcision articles on Wikipedia from 2004 - 2012. He is good friends with convicted pedophile Vernon Quaintance. He has coauthored pro-circumcision articles with Daniel Halperin and Thomas E. Wiswell. He also coauthored with Brian Morris who he was/is in regular contact with.

Robert C. Bailey, Ph.D, has published with Brian Morris and has written multiple articles advocated for widespread or universal circumcision. Bailey is an associate of the Gilgal Society."I know foreskin is not pretty, but these slides are pretty." - Bailey

Dr. Stefan A. Bailis, MA, PhysD, LP has published articles with Brian J. Morris, Thomas E. Wiswell, Jake Waskett, Edgar J. Schoen, and Ronald H. Gray.

Guy Cox Ph.D., a member of Circumcision Academy of Australia, writes erotic stories which make reference to the topic of circumcision. One of these stories is called "Airport Encounter." He was/is an active member of Inter-circ, "a global male circumcision appreciation group." He has co-authored parts of a book named, "Surgical Guide to Circumcision,” with Brian Morris. He owned a website boyguard.com, which attempted to sell chastity belts for teenage boys.

Dr. Leslie Schrieber, a member of Circumcision Academy of Australia, and co-author with Brian Morris.

Robin J. Willcourt is an American gynecologist and obstetrician, was a member of the alleged medical organization Circumcision Academy of Australia. In 1999, Willcourt was found guilty of disorderly conduct, whilst practicing as a Gynecologist/Obstetrician in the USA. The Nevada State Board of Medical Examiners (NBME) subsequently found that the offense constituted ‘a crime involving moral turpitude’ and ordered him to pay $4,055.35 ‘for costs involved in the investigation and prosecution of the case against him’. Willcourt’s explanation of the incident: ‘just imagine you’re there in the bushes and you’re taking a leak and somebody comes up behind you and starts talking dirty and you produce an erect penis. I don’t think I buy that. I think that is inconsistent physiologically. That’s one of the biggest holes I see in this case.’ Another said ‘I have a very difficult time believing this sequence of events and his explanation for it’. Transcript of Deliberations